


Playing with Death- The Dead Men War Book 2

by kaisantrash



Series: The Dead Men War [2]
Category: Skulduggery Pleasant - Derek Landy
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-27
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-03-24 17:00:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13815534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaisantrash/pseuds/kaisantrash
Summary: 13 year-old Valkyrie Cain is knee deep into the world of magic and know is kicking ass as an apprentice of the Dead Men. But even though Serpine is gone, his old mates are still around and they want back in.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> YOOOO I'm starting book 2!!!! I also realised I've been spelling Erskine's name wrong in book 1 but hey, that's what he gets for killing my boys.
> 
> Also, I'm aware that groupchats aren't really a thing this early in the 2000s but hey, it is now.

Satya Eka woke up to the sound of  _Hopeless_ by Dionne Farris. 

"Turn it off," She heard a voice mumble in her ear groggily.

Satya sighed, sitting up, holding the sheet to her body as she grabbed her phone, "Hopeless, this better be good."

 _"Baron Vengeous has been broken out of_ prison."

Satya blinked, straightening up. She shifted so the arm that was wrapped around her waist was pushed off, "I'll be there soon," She promised.

She hung up, grabbing her underwear that had shifted to under the bed.

"And where are you going?" China Sorrows asked, running a hand through her hair as she sat up, yawning.

"Sanctuary business," Satya said shortly.

"Care to elaborate?"

Satya buttoned her shirt, shooting her a wicked grin, "I'm sure you'll hear about it soon enough." As soon as she spoke, China's phone rang.

She reached for it and answered it, "Speak." She was silent for a moment before she tilted her head, "That is very interesting, thank you." She hung up.

"I suspect we both got very similar calls," Satya said, tucking in her shirt to her skirt.

"Baron Vengeous is out and has recovered the final ingredient he needs to raise the Grotesquery to bring back the Faceless Ones," China said.

Satya tilted her head, "I still find it weird how free you are with your information these days," She said, leaning over the bed to kiss her.

"Well, continue doing whatever it is you did last night then I'll continue to be free with my tongue," China said, once she pulled away. 

Satya grinned, "Sounds like a deal.

00000000000

"Why is he crying?" Melissa Edgley asked her daughter as she tapped away at her keyboard.

"Because I punched him in the nose," Valkyrie said bluntly.

Melissa raised her head in alarm, looking at the sniffling Vaurien Scapegrace, "And why did you do that for?!"

"Because he was trying to kill me," Valkyrie answered and raised his cuffed hands with one sharp movement.

"Ah," Melissa nodded, "Go on then. The Grand Mage wants to see you after."

Behind Valkyrie and Scapegrace, Dexter Vex snorted, "Grand mage," He repeated with a grin, "Never gets old."

"Behave, Vex," Skulduggery Pleasant said, his skull emotionless and blank, "Afterall, he could fire us."

Valkyrie snorted, earning a glare from her mother, "Sorry, Administrator," She apologised. 

Her mother threw a pen at her as she walked off. Dexter pushed the now openly sobbing Scapegrace towards the cells, "I'll handle this idiot," He said, "Go see Hopeless."

Valkyrie followed Skulduggery who waited for her to match his stride before asking, "Are you alright? You took quite the fall."

She shrugged, "Scapegrace managed to break most of it," She said, "Might need to grab more healing stones, though. I think I'll have some wicked bruises on my side tomorrow morning."

"We can stop by Grouse after," Skulduggery told her, opening the door to the Grand Mage's office, "No doubt he'll be excited to have the chance to tell me off again."

Valkyrie laughed at that but immediately stopped when she saw the grim faces of the office's occupants.

"About damn time," Satya muttered, shaking her head. She sat on the sofa, her right leg crossed over the other with a glass of wine in hand. Next to her sat Erskine Ravel, looking somber and tired.

Grand Mage Hopeless was leaning against his desk, dressed in the compulsory black robes of the Elders of the Sanctuary. He, unlike the man next to him, managed to wear the robes with a type of grace that was only available to good-looking people. The man who stood next to him was Thurid Guild. He looked to be in his sixties, with thinning gray hair and a lined face and cold eyes. And was thoroughly unlikable, in Valkyrie's opinion. On Hopeless' other side stood Mr Bliss- Or Elder Bliss, as he had been selected by Hopeless to advise him in running the Sanctuary. He was bald, tall, and broad-shouldered, with eyes a piercing blue- Eyes that were similar to his beautiful sister's, China Sorrows.

"This isn't a conversation for children," Guild sniffed, looking like someone had tracked mud onto his million dollar carpet.

"Valkyrie is an apprentice and therefore needs to be briefed on what she will be working on alongside us," Satya said boredly. Valkyrie hid a grin, knowing that the woman wanted to do nothing more than swear at the Elder, but unlike Hopeless and Elder Bliss, Guild wasn't one to take insults likely.

“I have received some disturbing news,” Bliss said, getting straight to the point as usual. “It seems that Baron Vengeous has been freed from the confinement facility in Russia.”

Skulduggery stiffened before speaking, "And how did he get out?"

“Violently, from the reports we’ve been getting,” Guild said. “Nine Cleavers were killed, along with approximately one third of the prisoners. His cell, like all the cells, was securely bound. Nobody should have been able to use magic in any of them.”

"Who is he?" Valkyrie asked, ignoring Guild's scathing glare.

"If Scapegrace was a one and Serpine a ten," Skulduggery started, "Vengeous is an eleven."

Valkyrie blinked then nodded, "Bad guy, right."

"Baron Vengeous was one of Mevolent’s infamous Three Generals. Dangerously fanatical, extremely intelligent, and very, very powerful," Satya said, "He has the power to simply look at someone and cause them to rupture."

"Do we know who's freed them?" Skulduggery asked.

"Reports are still coming in," Hopeless said with a sigh, "But according to the Russians, one wall of his cell was cracked like someone had hit it."

“The prison’s location is a closely guarded secret,” Bliss said. “It is well hidden and well protected. Whoever is behind this had inside knowledge.”

Guild made a face. “That’s the Russians’ problem, not ours. The only thing we have to concern ourselves with is stopping Vengeous.”

“You think he’ll come here, then?” Valkyrie asked.

Guild chose to ignore her question.

"Vengeous is unfortunately not fans of any of us," Erskine said with a wry smile, "Skulduggery, especially."

“I think we can assume,” Guild said, “That if Baron Vengeous is not already here, then he will be arriving shortly. You arrested him eighty years ago. We're relying on you to do it again.”

"We'll get it done," Skulduggery said solemnly. Valkyrie wanted to look at him to see if he was mocking the old man.

"Good," and with that- and another glare at Valkyrie- he left the office.

"Grand Mage," Bliss nodded respectively, about to take his leave too, "Detectives."

They all nodded back. As soon as the door shut, Satya said, "What do we do?"

"Go see China," Skulduggery ordered, "Find out what she knows."

"Way ahead of you," Satya told him, "She says that Vengeous has found the final key ingredient to waking the Grotesquery."

Skulduggery shook his head, "Impossible- He'll need Vile's armor."

"Time out, please," Valkyrie held out her hands to cease the conversation, "Someone explain to me what this Gross thing is."

“Before he was caught, Baron Vengeous was given the task of resurrecting a Faceless One from the remains found in a long-forgotten tomb," Hopeless began, choosing to sit down at his seat behind his desk.

Valkyrie frowned. “Is that even possible? Bringing one of them back to life after all this time?”

It was Skulduggery who answered her. “Bringing the Faceless One back _whole_ proved to be beyond his abilities, so Vengeous combined the remains with parts and organs from other creatures, forming a hybrid—what he called a Grotesquery. But even then, an ingredient was missing.”

“Two ingredients, apparently. First, he needed a Necromancer’s power to revive it, and then, once it was alive, he needed something to keep it that way. When Lord Vile died, Vengeous thought he could harness Vile’s power. Vile was a Necromancer, a practitioner of death magic—shadow magic. It is the Necromancer way to place most of their power in an object, or a weapon, or, in this case, his armor," Satya explained.

“So if Vengeous wore that armor,” Valkyrie said, “he’d have all Vile’s power. …”

“But he couldn’t find the armor,” Skulduggery said. “Lord Vile died alone, and his armor was lost.” Was it just Valkyrie or was Skulduggery glaring at Satya?

“What about the other missing ingredient? Did he find out what that was?” Erskine asked.

"If he did, China doesn't know," Satya said with a sigh, "But he has recovered it and now he can raise the Grotesquery if he had the armor."

“But if he _did_ , and he revived this thing, what would it do? Would we be able to stop it?”

Skulduggery hesitated for a split second. “The threat the Grotesquery would pose is a little bigger than that. Theoretically, it would be able to summon the Faceless Ones back to this world, by opening a portal through realities.”

“A portal?” Valkyrie said, a little doubtfully.

“Yes, but the Grotesquery would have to be at full strength to do it, and that’s not going to happen.”

“Why not?”

“A heart had to be provided for it, but the only one suitable was the heart of a Cú Gealach.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Cú na Gealaí Duibhe," Erskine repeated for her, "It means Hound of the Black Moon. They're a race of vicious beasts that were the only beings strong enough to hold the power of the half god."

"Regardless," Skulduggery said, his tone cautiously optimistic, "He wouldn't be able to revive it unless the stars, sun and moon were aligned."

"Which is in two days," Hopeless said quietly.

The skeleton's shoulders slumped, "Of course it is."

"Well," Satya stood, "I'm sure we'll have lots to talk about in preparation to find the bastard but darling Valkyrie has training to get to-" Valkyrie sighed in defeat. "I'll fill Dexter in with what he missed."

Hopeless nodded, "Good. I'll call Saracen, maybe he can go to the prison if he is still in Russia."

"I'll drag Robin out of the hotel," Erskine grumbled.

Valkyrie grinned, "Good luck with that."

Erskine narrowed his eyes, "Have fun getting beaten up by Tanith and Dexter."

Valkyrie winced at that, already feeling the bruises she would wake up with.

00000000000

Valkyrie woke up the next morning to the sounds of conversation downstairs. She sat up carefully, glad to find she wasn't wincing it pain. Good, the healing rocks had done their job.

And then that voice, drifting up the stairs like shrill parrots screeching broke the peace. Muttering to herself in annoyance, Valkyrie stood up and walked into the bathroom. She took a shower, then pulled on her school uniform before heading down to the kitchen.

Her mother was there, and sitting beside her was Valkyrie’s shrill, sharp-featured aunt, Beryl.

“Morning,” Valkyrie said as she passed them, going straight for the cupboard.

“Hi, love,” her mother said.

“Good morning, Stephanie,” Beryl said primly.

“Beryl,” Valkyrie said in greeting.

“How is school going for you?”

Valkyrie poured some cereal into her bowl, and added milk. She didn’t bother sitting. “It’s okay.”

“Are you studying hard? My girls are always studying. They get it from my side of the family, I have to say. It’s a valuable work ethic I’ve instilled in them.”

Valkyrie murmured and scooped a spoonful of cereal into her mouth, doubting the validity of just about everything Beryl had just said. Her aunt didn’t like her, and Valkyrie didn’t like her aunt. She was bitter about the fact that Valkyrie's uncle had left her his estate and fortune, while she had been left with a boat, a car and an ugly brooch- Which had eventually been stolen by the Dead Men.

"And she's getting so muscly," Beryl remarked in disdain, "No boy wants a girl bigger than them."

"And who says I want a boy?" Valkyrie shot back before turning red. She had definitely not meant to say that. Luckily, her mother came to the rescue, "Steph's always been independent," She said with a laugh, "She's doing lots of sports and learning martial arts."

Beryl wrinkled her nose, about to burst into a lecture when Valkyrie's father came in, dressed in smart trousers, undershirt, and a tie around his bare neck. He winked at Valkyrie, then noticed his sister-in-law.

“Beryl,” he said, utterly failing to hide his dismay.

“Desmond, good morning.”

“Beryl, what are you doing here? It’s not even eight o’clock. You know I don’t like seeing you before I’ve had my first cup of coffee.”

Beryl laughed that hideous fake laugh of hers. “Oh Desmond, you’re such a messer! I’m just here to talk to Melissa, that’s all. We’ve got a lot to organize for tomorrow night.”

“Oh dear God, the family reunion thing.” Valkyrie pulled a face, managing to hide her expression from her aunt as she spooned cereal into her mouth hurriedly.

“It’ll be wonderful!”

“But you’ll be there,” her dad said, puzzled, and Valkyrie nearly choked on her cereal.

Her mum looked up at him. “You forgot your shirt.”

“Oh yes, the reason I’m here. I don’t have a clean one.”

“Behind the door.”

He turned, saw the crisp white shirt hanging on the coat hook, and rubbed his hands together. He took it off the hook and put it on, sliding the collar up beneath the tie as he buttoned it. He didn’t like wearing ties—he owned a construction company, so he’d always thought he’d be in work boots and jeans. But every now and then he had to dress up and pretend—as he put it—to be civilized.

“So Steph,” he said, “looking forward to a great day in school?”

“Oh yes,” she said with mock enthusiasm.

“What do you think you’ll learn today?”

“I can’t begin to guess. Maybe how to subtract.”

He waved his hand dismissively. “Subtraction’s overrated. It’s like adding, only backward. You’re not ever going to need it.”

“Desmond!” Beryl said sternly. “You shouldn’t take that attitude. Stephanie is at an easily influenced age, and she needs to be taught that everything she learns in school is valuable. Joking around is all well and good, but some things just have to be taken seriously. How can you ever expect Stephanie to be responsible when all you ever do is set a bad example?”

“I don’t know,” he answered. “Luck, I suppose.”

Beryl sighed in exasperation and looked like she was about to try to give a lecture. Valkyrie and her father both pounced on the same opportunity before Beryl could utter another word.

“I’m going to school,” Valkyrie said quickly, shoveling the last spoonful of cereal into her mouth.

“I’m going to work,” her dad said, only a millisecond behind.

Valkyrie slipped her bowl into the dishwasher and walked for the door.

“But Desmond, you haven’t had any breakfast,” Valkyrie’s mother said with a frown.

“I’ll get something on the way,” her father said, following Valkyrie out.

They got to the hallway. 

"Want a ride?" Desmond offered. 

"Oh god, yes," Valkyrie replied, "My legs are killing me."

Desmond grinned, "I think that's supposed to be my line," He said, "You're acting too old for your age, I'm supposed to be complaining about my legs and back."

Valkyrie snorted, "If you want to go to training in my place, be my guest," She told him.

"I think I'll leave the magic stuff to you, thanks."

Despite all her complaining, Valkyrie genuinely enjoyed training. Sure, she preferred Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays more - When either Skulduggery or Robin would teach her the ways of Elementals - but she didn't mind the days where Dexter and Tanith would push, make her warm up and spar. She loved the feeling of bouncing on her heels, kicking and punching and flipping. 

Desmond dropped Valkyrie off outside the school. The Edgleys' had moved closer to the Sanctuary, taking the Dead Men's advice. She had moved schools as well.

She'd been at this new school for six months now, and still hadn't made any close friends. Not that she minded, she'd rather spend her break times catching up with her homework so she could spend all her time after school training. 

Valkyrie pulled out her phone as she walked through the school gates, past groups of boys and giggling girls. 

 _Make sure you keep me updated,_ she texted Skulduggery.

About half a minute later, he texted back  _Could be nothing but our guys at the docks haven't checked in yet._

She furrowed her eyebrows,  _You'll bail me out if something important comes up, right?_

_Of course. That's what a reflection is for._

She headed towards the back of the school, towards a quite area that was surrounded by trees and included a few benches.

Suddenly, she stiffened. There was someone watching her. She discreetly held out her hand, letting the air tell her what she need to know.

Valkyrie unlocked her phone quickly, pushing Skulduggery's contact. She waited for him to answer before putting her phone to her ear, "Someone's watching me," She said quickly.

 _"Where are you?"_ His voice was quick, urgent.

"Behind the school- Ah, shit." Valkyrie took a step back as a man in black stepped into view.

He was pale, and oddly beautiful, and way too calm. “There you are,” he said, "I was beginning to think my information was bad."

Valkyrie glared. “Who are you? How did you find out where I live?”  
“I followed you,” he said. “I lost you when you came into town, so I decided to wait around until you showed up again. I even made some new friends.”

  
Now she saw them: a young couple, walking toward her. She knew them. She didn’t knowtheir names, but she’d seen them around, holding hands, laughing. They weren’t laughing now. They were pale, as pale as the man in black. They looked sick, and there were bloodstains on their clothes. They watched her with dark, dead eyes. She looked at the man in black, remembered the graceful way he had moved.

  
“You’re a vampire,” she breathed.

“And you are Valkyrie Cain, and you’re coming with us.”

She couldn’t fight them. There was no way she was even close to being ready.  
So she twisted around and ran. 

The young couple were after her, sprinting, feet thudding on the grass. She kept ahead of them easily but she knew they were gaining fast- Problem was, she had no idea where the first vampire was.

The man in black was running at her side, moving without effort. She tried to duck away, but he reached out a lazy hand, his fingers closing around her arm, and stopped suddenly. She jerked to a painful halt.

She swung a punch, but he moved slightly and her fist connected with nothing but air. She tried to kick and he took a step, the expression on his face never going beyond bored, and he grabbed Valkyrie’s arm and twisted it behind her back, and her knees hit the ground.

“The Baron wants you alive,” he said. “Bear in mind, he did not specify unharmed. Do not try to hit me again.”

She called him something that she had heard Satya call Robin when he pissed her off, causing the vampire to just laugh.

“How about us?” Skulduggery said as he ran up behind him. “Can we hit you?”

The man in black released Valkyrie and turned, too late to stop Skulduggery’s fist from smacking into his jaw. He staggered and Skulduggery splayed his hand. The air rushed into the vampire and sent him backward, head over heels. Instead of sprawling onto the grass, however, his body moved with an inhuman agility, and he twisted sideways and landed on his feet.

“Detective,” he murmured.

“Dusk,” Skulduggery said. “It’s been a while. Still evil?”

The man called Dusk smiled. “When the mood takes me.” He gestured to the young couple.

“Allow me to introduce you to my friends. I like to call them Minion One and Minion Two. You can decide between yourselves which one is which.”

The couple moved to attack only to get hit with a beams of light. 

"That was fun," Dexter said, stepping in from behind Skulduggery.

"Vex," Dusk spat out, his eyes narrowing. Dexter grinned back, "Good seeing you, Dusk," He said cheerfully, "I see you found someone else to hold your leash."

Dusk hissed at him, only to be punched again by Skulduggery. This time, the vampire was unprepared and fell to the ground, earning another hard hit to the head which he managed to dodge with incredible speed.

Now that he could no longer be taken by surprise, Dusk’s supernatural grace and athleticism were keeping him away from Skulduggery’s strikes. He swept out of range of the punches and kicks, and every hold Skulduggery tried, Dusk eased out of before it was even completed.

He kicked Skulduggery and moved backward, and as he did so, something fell from his pocket. He glanced at it and moved to retrieve it, but Skulduggery held out his hand, and it flew into his grip.

It was a syringe, filled with a colorless liquid.  
Dusk shrugged. “You can keep it,” he said. “I’ve got plenty more.” Dexter threw his beam of light at Dusk, but the vampire ran off, dodging it easily. Valkyrie watched Dusk fade into the cover of the trees.

Dexter swore.

Skulduggery was at Valkyrie’s side, holding her arm as he used the toe of his shoes to nudge the unconscious minions, “They’ve been infected,” he said, “but they’re not lost. Not yet. We don’t want to kill them."

"I'll call Grouse," Dexter said.

"Call your mother," Skulduggery ordered Valkyrie, "You're taking the day off."

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yooo so it looks like I'm actually going to be starting a posting schedule: Hopefully, I'll have atleast one chapter posted by friday night and if yall are lucky i'll have another one done on the saturday.

Valkyrie pressed her palm against her mirror, watching with wide eyes as her reflection stepped out of the glass.

Melissa had left home just minutes before Valkyrie called her. She had been frantic on the phone but slightly annoyed - "Of course a vampire tries to kidnap you on the day you have a test that makes up 25% of your grade."

Valkyrie then proceeded to convince her mother to let her use her reflection and Skulduggery had backed her up - "The reflection is an imitation, a weak imitation albeit, but it does have her memories and knowledge. It's not cheating."

So, Skulduggery and Valkyrie left Dexter with the unconscious 'pets' to wait for the Cleavers to pick them up and take them to Krenspeckle Grouse and made their way back to Valkyrie's house where she activated the reflection and changed into her magic-proof clothes that Ghastly tailored for her.

"Satya's going to see China," Skulduggery said, hanging up from the call as Valkyrie walked into the kitchen.

Valkyrie grinned widely.

"What?"

"What?"

"You grinned."

"Did I?"

Skulduggery tilted his head, "What are you hiding, Cain?"

"None of your damn business, Pleasant," Valkyrie replied, her smile widening, "Why is she going to China anyway?"

"To see if she know's anything about Dusk and if Baron visited her."

"Besides the fact that she know's all the gossip, why would he visit her?"

"Because China used to worship the Faceless Ones."

Valkyrie gaped at him as they got into the car, "What?!"

"Her and Bliss were raised in a family that worshiped them but Bliss left pretty much as soon as he had his Surge. China stuck around till the Peace Treaty and then went neutral," Skulduggery said, his voice blank and unfeeling.

Valkyrie swallowed, "Then why do you all trust her?"

Skulduggery was silent for a moment, "Because it would be hypocritical of any of us to fault her for what happened during the war," He said, his voice unnaturally soft, "We all did horrible things during the war."

Valkyrie was quiet.

0000000000000

Satya had to stop by her place so she could kick off her heels and trade them for sturdy boots, her pencil skirt and blouse for her leather jacket and heels before they got back into the car and drove to China's - for Satya's second time in 48 hours.

They got out of the car, making their way upto the apartment.

"Stop," Satya held her hand to stop Erskine, "There's someone here."

Erskine listened, and waited for her to put a mask up. The door to the library was ajar and the library was seemingly empty. They went in, their steps silenced as they hid behind a bookcase that was infront of China's main office area. If anyone were to pass by them, they would've simply seen a case of old books.

"-place is right here." Satya heard China say coolly.

"We both know that's not true. You could no more turn your back on the Faceless Ones than I could. I have seen your devotion."

Erskine swore quietly at the sound of Baron Vengeous' voice. Satya's hand tightened around his arm, tense and waiting.

"My devotion, as you call it, has waned."

Vengeous' tone turned angry, "You have sworn your allegiance to the dark gods. You cannot simply change your mind."

"I'm afraid I can, and I have."

Satya signed to Erskine, We need to get closer.

He nodded and they crept closer and Satya could see China, sitting in her chair, seemingly at ease behind her desk, Baron Vengeous leaning over, his face turning red in anger.

"You are their servant," he said, his voice low and threatening. "If you will not uphold the vow you made on your own, then I will do it for you. You will be there when the Faceless Ones return, even if it is just so you can be the first traitor they kill."

Satya swore as she watched him reach over to grab China but before she could act, China put her left hand flat on her belly and flicked her right, and every piece of furniture in the room flew at Vengeous.

Tables and chairs and bookcases crashed into Vengeous at a terrible speed. They clattered to the floor and he staggered and fell, blood running down his face. Then another tap of her belly and another whip of her hand, and the furniture moved away, clearing a space around the Baron.

"You do not threaten me in my own home," China said, and sent the furniture hurtling back to him.

But Vengeous was quick, and he lunged forward, eyes flashing yellow. The table that was coming directly for him suddenly exploded into a hundred thousand splinters and he dived through them, escaping the rest of the furniture that impacted on the wall behind him.

He sent his hand into her chest and she pitched backward. She hit the wall and fell to one knee.

Satya dropped the mask and she and Erskine walked into the clearing, fireballs forming in their palms.

Baron snarled at the sight, dodging Erskine's fireball but Satya's catching his shoulder. He stumbled, back, holding his hand out to use his magic but China slowly stood.

"As my words draw closed, the circle binds, secures you to your fate."

Vengeous reached for her but hit something, an invisible wall. He tried to back off, but he only got a couple of steps before he hit another barrier. He looked down, looked at the elaborate carpet, and saw the circle hidden in the design.

He snarled again, "You think this can keep me in?" He let out a laugh, "You didn't … you didn't really think it would be that easy, did you?"

Satya swore, spinning around just in time to get punched in the stomach by Dusk. She keeled over before straightening, sweeping her legs under his feet to unstable him.

A man followed. The stranger had blond hair and wore a brown suit, a white shirt, and dark sunglasses. His cowboy boots were old and scuffed, and he was grinning.

Erskine ran for him, immediately sending a fireball which the man dodged before throwing a punch. Erskine ducked, tackling him.

The man swore with a strong Texan accent before throwing him off with a strong kick, and all of a sudden the carpet at his feet frayed and split, and he sank downward, disappearing into the floor.

Erskine dived for him, missing his fingers by inches.

Satya was too busy sending fireballs at Dusk, using air to move the shelves to block him from reaching Baron Vengeous.

China let out a sound of rage, reaching out with her arms, her palms glowing blue with the sigils bright as light blasted at Vengeous just as Satya managed to see him get swallowed up by the carpet. The floor sealed up behind him, and the symbols pulsed one last time, then returned to normal.

A moment later Vengeous and the stranger stepped through the wall beside China.

And Dusk came up behind Satya with inhumane speed, bringing an arm around her neck, "Watch yourself."

"Let her go," Erskine said, his hands out in surrender.

"I think not," Vengeous murmured with a grin, "Don't let her touch anything," He warned the Texan with dark sunglasses, "She has sigils everywhere."

The stranger nodded, taking China's arms and forcing them behind her back. She glared at him in disdain.

"You're not going to be able to raise the old Gods," Satya said, her teeth gritted as she felt Dusk's sharp teeth brush against her neck. "You need Vile's armor and you won't bloody find it."

"You sure about that, Eka?" Vengeous said with a smile, stepping towards Erskine.

Erskine took a step back, "Let them go," He said, his hand slowly drifting to his pocket, "The Sanctuary are still regrouping, you'll have a headstart."

Dusk let out a laugh. Satya stiffened as his teeth grazed her neck before pulling away.

"I intend to let you go," Vengeous said slightly cheerfully, using a handkerchief to wipe the blood from the cut on his forehead, "I can still be merciful, even if my gods are not. The girl, Valkyrie Cain. Tell me where she is, and I will let you all live."

"Over my dead body, you fucker," Satya spat before wheezing, Dusk's arm tightened.

"Ironic, coming from a Dead Man," The Texan said with a laugh, tightening his hold on China.

"And who the hell are you?" Erskine asked snappily, watching Vengeous out of the corner of his eye.

"Billy-Ray Sanguine, at your service," The Texan replied, "I would salute but I don't think Miss Sorrows wants to be in my company."

"It's the smell of American," She shot back, "It's frankly, quite disgusting."

He twisted, and China cried out in pain.

"Okay-" Erskine held out a hand, "Don't try anything stupid, Vengeous. You know what Skulduggery's like when someone he considers a friend gets hurt. You remember him right?"

Vengeous' lip curled, "I remember almost killing him."

"You can't kill a Dead Man," Satya managed out, "He was always too smart for you."

Vengeous snarled, "I will get that girl and watch you all fall to your knees as you watch her blood bring back the Gods- I will sacrifice you to them and I will be honoured by them!"

"You want me?" They all heard a girl's voice call from out of sight, "Come and get me yourself, asshole."

"That girl is going to get us all killed," Satya muttered before stomping on Dusk's foot, twisting and jabbing him in the head with her sharp elbow. Dusk roared, grabbing her again, only to be hit with a fireball that came out of nowhere.

Erskine ran towards China and Sanguine as China swung his head back, hitting the Texan in the face. He stumbled back, swearing.

Vengeous crashed into a wall of shelves, Skulduggery's fireball hitting him square in the chest.

Erskine punched Sanguine as China's sigils lit up on her skin, matching the glowing symbols on the floor and wall. Erskine moved to grab Sanguine but the man was too quick, stumbling into the wall and disappearing.

The sigils glowed brightly before exploding on the ground exactly where Satya and Dusk were having it out.

Satya managed to throw up shadows, making her a blur as she fought. But unfortunately, the fast vampire was as much as a blur as her mask was.

She manged to throw herself to the side as the sigils exploded at Dusk's feet. He let out a cry as the fire burnt his skin, the smell of burning flesh filling the air.

And in seconds, he was gone.

000000000

Valkyrie watched, wide eyed from the safety of the hallway as the fight went on. Then she suddenly stiffened she felt an arm rest on her shoulder, a razor blade resting against her throat.

"Now, let's me and you take a little trip," Billy-Ray Sanguine said casually.

Valkyrie swallowed, her throat pressing against the blade dangerously.

Then suddenly, they were swallowed up by the ground and reappeared out the side of the apartment block in an alley way.

Valkyrie stumbled away from him, breathing heavily as she clutched her throat, trying to readjust.

"Personally, I don't see what the big deal is," Sanguine continued casually, as if they hadn't just gone through three levels of apartment and fallen out of a concrete wall, "Sure, Ancients' blood and all that. But Vengeous' quest for... well, vengeous is easier to pull off if you weren't in the equation."

As Valkyrie straightened up, she could spy a very familiar black motorbike across the street over the Texan's shoulder.

"Then let me go," She said, "If you can pull this off without me, why bother kidnapping me."

Sanguine threw his head back and laughed, "I don't think so, girly," He told her, "I'm still getting paid by the Baron so I'm going to do what I'm paid to do."

And then someone coughed right behind them. The man looked around, and Tanith Low kicked him in the face. His glasses fell to the ground to reveal two holes in place of his eyes.

He stumbled, and Valkyrie tore herself free, spinning around to keep him in sight as she backed off to the wall. He would have been handsome were it not for those awful black holes.

Sanguine smiled. "And who might you be?"

"You first," Tanith said.

He chuckled. "Very well. Billy-Ray Sanguine, master of all manner of unpleasant deaths and purveyor of cruel and unusual punishments, at your service."

"A hit man," Tanith muttered, "Great."

"Oh, honey- I'm not any ol' hitman. I'm the hitman deluxe. Now, who are you, pretty lady?"

Tanith grinned, slowly pulling off her jacket and dropping it to the side before brandishing her sword, "The last thing you'll see before the inside of your cell. Are you going to come along quietly, Mr. Sanguine, or do I have to hurt you?"

Sanguine grinned.

Tanith lunged and Sanguine ducked, the sword whistling over his head. Tanith flicked her wrist, and the blade zipped back toward him, but he jumped out of range, giving a laugh.

"Now, this is fun! Two grown people, gettin' to know each other the old-fashioned way. Romance is in the air."

"You're not my type."

"You don't know what your type is, darlin'."

"I know you're not it. Mr. Sanguine, I've got some shackles with your name on them."

"Shackles can't hold me, pretty lady. I'm immune to just about every binding spell I reckon you ever heard of, and a few more you haven't. That's what makes me special."

Valkyrie pulled a face. The fact that a hit man was hitting on her tutor was the probably the strangest thing she'd seen all day. And this was the same day she had been almost killed by a vampire.

Tanith lunged again but Sanguine just dodged her sword and got swallowed up by the ground.

She swore, "You okay, Cain?" She asked Valkyrie.

Valkyrie nodded before asking, "When'd you get back from London?"

"This morning. Bliss told me to come here- Apparently, something set off China's alarms," Tanith said and then the wall behind her crumbled and Billy-Ray Sanguine dived at her.

Tanith, for her part, seemed incapable of being taken by surprise and simply stepped away, her sword casually slicing Sanguine's forearm. Covered in dirt, he howled in pain and the razor fell to the ground. He danced back, wincing as he cradled his arm. 

Valkyrie looked at the ground beside her feet. "Don't you dare," Sanguine warned, glaring at her with those black holes, but she paid no heed. She stooped and picked up the straight razor, and this infuriated him even further, "Bitch," He muttered, standing up.

"Tanith," Valkyrie warned as Baron Vengeous strode in off the street and stood in the mouth of the alley. Valkyrie tensed. How was he here? What happened to Skulduggery and the others.

"Get the job done," Vengeous ordered, his eyes flashing angrily, "There's too many of them." Valkyrie noticed he was leaning heavily on his left leg, like he had been injured.

A black Jeep pulled up beside Vengeous, and Dusk got out, his jacket had seemingly been burnt to ashes as he only wore a shirt.

"Be right with you, Baron."

But Vengeous wasn't waiting. He got into the Jeep and Dusk got back behind the wheel, and they drove off.

Suddenly alone, Sanguine stopped glowering. He looked at his adversaries and licked his lips. He was still holding his injured arm, blood trickling between his fingers.

A side door opened - a door that Valkyrie hadn't noticed - and out came Skulduggery and Erskine. Satya and China were nowhere to be seen.

"What is Baron Vengeous planning?" asked Skuldugery, his voice terrible and quiet.

"I don't know," Sanguine said. "No wait, I'm lyin'. I do know, I'm just not tellin'."

"Then it's a good thing we have friends that enjoy pulling secrets out of people," Erskine said. He looked relatively unharmed.

But it was too late, the ground at Sanguine's feet had begun to crack.

"Get him!" Valkyrie yelled, reaching forward. Tanith swore, doing the same but they were too slow.

"I'll be back for my razor, Cain!" They heard from under them as the cracks in the ground sealed.

"Son of a bitch," Erskine muttered.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some Robin/Anton talk. Also I finally read Armageddon Outta Here? And I can't believe that it's actually canon that Hopeless is a shapeshifter?? Why did no one tell me? So I'm gonna do a rewrite after this chapter because I can't stand the non compliance :) The story will be pretty much the same, it'll just be a bit different around Hopeless. This chapter onwards is with Hopeless as a shape shifter.

Robin Larrikin nudged the Cleaver's torso with his foot before nodding, "Yup, he's dead."

Dexter snorted, "What gave it away? The blood or the lack of head?"

As soon as the Cleavers had arrived for the would-be Vampires at Valkyrie's school, Dexter left for the Midnight Hotel which had parked roughly twenty minutes away from the Sanctuary and picked up Robin before they made their way to the docks, checking in on the Cleavers who were supposed to be keeping watch for Baron Vengeous.

It was pretty safe to assume that the Baron had arrived in Ireland, seeing as said Cleavers were lying on the docks, headless with their brains and blood splattering against the side of their boat.

Dexter sent photos to Hopeless, slipping his phone into his pocket before speaking, "So, how was Australia?"

Robin immediately brightened, "Amazing!" He gushed, "And hot- Anton left me there for a couple of days and when he came back, I had dyed my green!" 

Dexter snorted, shaking his head. Typical Robin.

"He refused to speak to me until I fixed it, though," Robin added, "So, I slipped dye into  _his_ shampoo instead!"

Dexter gaped at him as he sat down in the driver's seat of his car, "How are you alive?" He asked cautiously, "I can imagine his reaction."

Robin grinned widely, "He loves me too much to try and kill me," He said cheerfully before sobering, "I'm thinking about proposing."

Again, Dexter snorted as he started the car, "You told me you were going to propose before I left for Casablanca in the 30s and you told Satya you were going to do so well over two hundred years ago," He reminded the redhead.

Robin shrugged, "This time I mean it," He said, "As soon as we get Baron Vengeous and his little minions, I'll do it." His smile fell slightly, "I almost lost him last year with Serpine- He was really badly hurt and I don't remember him ever being that hurt since the War."

Dexter could hear the pure worry and concern in Robin's voice. It was easy to forget, sometimes, how close and intimate Robin and Anton were. They were the stark opposites of each other; Robin being loud and seemingly always happy while Anton was closed off and muted. Not to mention the fact that Anton hated outward affection, so it was a rare moment when anyone would see the two act like lovers. It had taken Valkyrie about a month to realise that they were in fact together.

Dexter's thoughts were interrupted by Robin's loud ringtone. "Hey, Bones!" Robin answered cheerfully before frowning, "We know, we just found the Cleavers' bodies." 

Dexter frowned.

"Ah... Are they okay?" 

After a few moments, Robin nodded, "Okay, we'll meet you there then." He hung up.

"What news?"

"The Baron, Dusk and a new guy called Billy-Ray attacked China, Satya and Erskine. They're fine though. Billy-Ray managed to grab Valkyrie and pulled her through a wall but Tanith stopped him," Robin told him, "We're rendezvousing at the Sanctuary."

Dexter answered by taking a sharp U-turn, causing Robin to swear loudly as he grabbed the handles.

00000000000000

"Oh, thank god!" Melissa flung herself at her daughter, wrapping her in a tight hug.

"Mum-" Valkyrie managed out, "C-Can't breathe-!"

Melissa held on for a few moments before letting go, composing herself before speaking, "I was so worried, Steph," She said, checking to see that Valkyrie was alright.

"I'm fine, Mum," Valkyrie reassured her with a grin, "All in a days work, right?"

Satya said nothing pushing past them to go into Hopeless' office, Erskine and Tanith following close behind. Skulduggery, however, waited silently behind the girl.

Melissa sighed, then nodded, kissing her quickly on the forehead, "I should probably get back to work," She said with a sigh, "Will you be home for dinner?" 

"Most likely," Skulduggery answered, "I wanted to stop by Gordon's place to see if he had any information on what we're working on. I can drop her home after."

Melissa nodded, "Call if something changes." She left after giving Valkyrie another kiss on the forehead before leaving.

"Are mothers always so overbearing?" Valkyrie wondered aloud with a sigh.

"Oh yes," Skulduggery nodded solemnly, "I remember my own wouldn't let me leave the house lest the wolves got in."

Valkyrie stared at in shock, "Seriously?"

"Of course not, I was way too scary for those wolves."

Valkyrie grinned, "See that's funny because Satya told me you had a stutter and were like -" She held her hand slightly above her head, "ye high when you met- Some scary kid."

She could tell Skulduggery was glaring at her.

"Speaking of Satya," He said smoothly as he reached to rest his hand on Hopeless' office door handle, "When were you planning on telling me that you knew about her and China?"

Valkyrie snorted, "Finally figured it out, have you?" She shook her head with a grin, following him inside, "Some detective."

"-Billy-Ray character," Tanith was saying, "He sounds like an arsehole."

"Indeed he is," Skulduggery said, "I made contact with a few American friends-"

"You have friends?" Satya asked innocently.

"-who said he's a burrower- Slightly obvious- and a hit-man for hire. And even more interestingly enough, Dreylan Scarab's son," Skulduggery finished, pretending Satya hadn't spoken. 

"I happened to find out while you were off adventuring about someone who may know where Vengeous hid the Grotesquery," Hopeless said, "Gordon was working on a book about the whole affair when he died," He explained, "He may have hidden away some important information."

Skulduggery nodded, "I said the same thing before," He said smoothly, "It seems unlikely that Gordon would research so much about the Faceless Ones and Ancients but not the Grotesquery."

Hopeless nodded, seeming slightly flustered.

"What is it?" Satya asked sharply, "You seem on edge." 

"I-" He hesitated slightly, "Guild is giving me strange vibes. It reminds me of..." He shared a look with her before looking at Skulduggery and clearing his throat, "Anyway, Saracen called. Anton is docking in Russia and they should be back here tomorrow morning."

Tanith stood, seemingly confused, "I'll follow you on the bike," She told Skulduggery and Valkyrie, "I want to finish reading."

Valkyrie was just as confused as she was at the exchange but laughed, "Of course you do," She said with a grin. Tanith was an avid Gordon Edgley fan and never failed to offer to come with Valkyrie whenever she visited the mansion.

"Now, if that's all," Satya stood, resting a hand on Erskine's shoulder, "I'm going to go home and take a nice, long bath- I'm sure you all can save the world without me for the day?"

Hopeless nodded is approval, "You too, Erskine- Dexter and Robin will be here if anything urgent comes up."

Erskine got up, "I might go and bother Ghastly for a little bit," He said with a grin, "That asshole Texan managed to catch my jacket," He gestured to the tear on his jacket.

Valkyrie pulled out the straight razor that had caused the tear, "I may or may not have stolen this from said asshole," She said.

"Careful," Hopeless warned, "Sanguine doesn't seem like the forgiving type."

00000000000000

Skulduggery and Valkyrie pulled into Gordon's driveway. Tanith's roaring motorcycle came to a halt beside them. She expertly kicked down her stand, pulling off her helmet and shaking out her blonde hair with a grin.

"I couldn't have gone with her," Valkyrie said, slightly glum.

"And leave me to explain to your mother why her daughter went splat on the motorway? I don't think so."

Valkyrie pulled a face as she got out of the Bentley.

"How's school?" Tanith asked.

"Meh- Pretty boring. I'm starting to wish I never told my parents so I could just use my reflection full time and stay working at the Sanctuary," Valkyrie confessed, "I learn way more from you guys than I do in the stupid classroom."

"Fair enough," Tanith said, "But there are still some skills that you can learn in school that can help in the real world."

"You didn't even go to high school," Valkyrie said with a grin, "How could you possibly know?"

"Case in point," Skulduggery commented dryly, unlocking Gordon's front door with the key Valkyrie tossed him.

"Oi," Tanith warned good-naturedly, "Not like you can talk."

“I still find it hard to believe you’re a fan," Valkyrie said as they walked in. The hall was grand, with Gothic paintings on the walls. They passed through into the living room.

“Your uncle was the best writer ever,” Tanith said. “Why wouldn’t I be a fan?”

“You just, I don’t know, you don’t really strike me as being the type. It’s like when your friend thinks that your dad is the coolest guy in the world, y’know? It just seems a little silly.”

“Well, there was nothing silly about your uncle’s writing. Did I tell you that one of his short stories was based on something that happened to me?”

“You told me. Many times.”

“I never met him, but he must have heard about it somehow. Maybe Skulduggery heard it, and he told Gordon.”

"Nope," Skulduggery answered, pulling off his coat, "Wasn't me. Probably Hopeless."

Tanith stood in the center of the living room, gazing around with a slightly wistful look on her face. “And this is where Gordon lived. This is where he wrote his masterpiece. You’re a lucky girl, Val. What was it like, having an uncle like Gordon Edgley?”

“We’re not getting into this conversation,” Valkyrie said. “Not again.” She went to the bookshelf, took down a book bound in black, and handed it to Tanith. Tanith bit her lip.

 _And the Darkness Rained upon Them_ was the last thing Gordon Edgley had written. It was set to be published in a few months, but Valkyrie had let Tanith read the advance copy. Every time Tanith was at the house, she devoured another few chapters until it was time to go. She loved coming here, and seized every chance she had to drop by.

Without another word spoken, Tanith took the book to the couch, curled up, and resumed reading.

"Now can we get to work?" Skulduggery asked, "I did promise your mum that you would be home for dinner."

Valkyrie shook her head at him but followed him upstairs to Gordon's study. Unlike the rest of the house, Gordon’s study was a chaotic affair, a mass of straining shelves and piles of stacked manuscripts. She went to the bookshelf that covered the far wall, scanning the titles. This was where he had kept his research material. Very occasionally, Valkyrie would find books on magic in this room that she hadn’t been able to find even in the library of China Sorrows.

"So, are you going to the family reunion?" Skulduggery asked curiously as they began looking through the titles in the room.

"I don't want to," Valkyrie answered, "But Mum said unless the world is ending and you lot can't handle it without me then I'm going."

"It might do you good," Skulduggery said offhandedly, "You spend far to much time with us."

Valkyrie narrowed her eyes, "Are you trying to get rid of me?"

Skulduggery did the equivalent of a splutter, his shoulders slumping, "No- I'm simply saying you need to remember you are a teenager too. As much as Robin acts like a child, he isn't one and you do need to spend some time around people your own age."

Valkyrie traced the titles of the books with a sigh, "I go to school, don't I?"

"I suppose so."

"That's more than enough time around idiots my own age, I think." Valkyrie's fingertip stopped on a thick, leather-bound book with no title on its spine. She’d seen it before but had never paid it much attention. She tried slipping it from the shelf, but it wouldn’t budge. Frowning, she gripped it and pulled. It came out halfway and stuck, and then the wall started to move.

"No freaking way," She stumbled back, eyes wide.

"Well," Skulduggery tilted his head, "Slightly unexpected."

"Just a bit, yeah."

The bookshelf swung open before her, revealing a room as black as night.

A secret room. An actual real, secret room.

Not bothering to subdue the excited grin that spread across her face, Valkyrie stepped in. The room immediately lit up with candles. Like the study, the secret room was lined with shelves, and on those shelves were objects both alien and familiar.

Before her was a table, and on that table a blue jewel, nestled in a golden claw centerpiece. A faint light within the jewel started to glow as she stepped closer, and a man faded up from nothing on the other side of the room.

Portly. Wearing brown slacks and a matching waistcoat over a shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his forearms. Sandy hair that perched on top of his head like a loose bale of straw, shot through with gray. He turned and his eyes widened when he saw them.

"Oh snap," Valkyrie muttered.

"Oh snap, indeed," Skulduggery said smoothly, "Gordon, it has been awhile."

"Steph? Skulduggery-" Gordon Edgley's mouth opened and closed like a goldfish, "Oh dear- If the two of you are here together then things must be bad-"

"I've started to think that nothing could surprise me," Skulduggery said, oddly calm despite the fact that a dead old friend had just appeared, "But you've decided to prove me wrong."

"How are you here?!" Valkyrie exclaimed.

“Oh, well, I’m not. Not really. This isn’t me. I mean, I am me, but I’m not. See the blue jewel? It’s very rare; it’s called an Echo Stone, and generally it’s used—”

“I know about Echo Stones.”

“You do?”

“People sleep with the Stone close by for three nights, and by doing so, they imprint it with their personality.”

“Oh. Yes, you’re quite right,” he said, and looked a little disappointed. “It’s generally used by the dying, to help their loved ones through their grief, or to answer any lingering questions they might have, things like that. For me, however, it was more like a writing aid.”

“A writing aid?”

“I imprinted my consciousness onto the Stone. Or rather, the _real_ Gordon imprinted _me_ onto the 

erally it’s used—”

“I know about Echo Stones.”

“You do?”

“People sleep with the Stone close by for three nights, and by doing so, they imprint it with their personality.”

“Oh. Yes, you’re quite right,” he said, and looked a little disappointed. “It’s generally used by the dying, to help their loved ones through their grief, or to answer any lingering questions they might have, things like that. For me, however, it was more like a writing aid.”

“A writing aid?”

“I imprinted my consciousness onto the Stone. Or rather, the _real_ Gordon imprinted _me_ onto the Stone. He comes in whenever he’s stuck on a plot point or when he needs a new perspective on a story, or when he just wants a conversation with someone who can actually challenge him, intellectually. We have some pretty interesting talks, let me tell you.”

"That is quite genius," Skulduggery said, "And nothing less than what I expected from Gordon Edgley."

"Why didn't you- he- just use a reflection?" Valkyrie asked quizzically, "I mean, same dramatic flair- more actual humanness."

"Well, I don't know!" Gordon huffed, "Maybe I'm too amazing for there to be two of me! Why don't you ask the real Gordon?!"

"Ah..." Skulduggery shared a glance with Valkyrie like  _Who's going to break it to him?_

"Do you remember the last time you spoke with Gordon—the other Gordon, the real Gordon?”

His eyes narrowed. “Why? Stephanie, what’s wrong?”

She hesitated. “My name is Valkyrie.”

“Valerie?”

“Valkyrie. With a k. Valkyrie Cain. You left this house to me in your will.”

He stared at her. “Oh. Oh no.”

"Yeah..." Valkyrie trailed off, "I met the Dead Men and they've been taking care of me!" She said, trying to sound upbeat, "And Mum and Dad- Even Fergus- know about magic!"

He covered his face with his hands.

She waited for him to look up. When he didn’t, she searched for words to fill the silence. “I understand that this must come as a shock. …”

Finally, he raised his head. “How did I die?”

“Nefarian Serpine killed you,” Valkyrie said, as gently as she could under the circumstances. “Well, killed _Gordon_. Killed _you_ , I suppose. …”

“Serpine killed me? Then he has the Scepter! Quickly, Stephanie, we have no time to lose—”

“Don’t worry, he’s dead," Skulduggery cut him off, "All taken care of. We have bigger problems as of right now."

“We’re trying to track down this nut job who escaped from prison, Baron Vengeous.”

“Vengeous?” Echo-Gordon said. “He’s out?”

“We think he wants to bring the Grotesquery to life.”

Echo-Gordon’s eyes bulged. “The Grotesquery? That is quite unfair! I’ve been meaning to write a book about that whole thing, and now I’m dead!”

“That is very unfair,” Skulduggery said, nodding in agreement. “So do you know anything about it?”

“A little, I suppose. I don’t have any books about it, but I know that it was put together from bits and pieces of some quite impressive creatures. I didn’t think it was possible to bring it to life, though.”

“We’re trying to figure that out too.”

Echo-Gordon shook his head in awe. “Astounding. Genuinely astounding. It’s got a stinger, apparently, from a Helaquin, and parts of a Shibbach were grafted on. From what I’ve read, Baron Vengeous had to rearrange its insides entirely, give it a whole new set of internal organs. The heart he gave it, from a Cu Gealach, is on the right side, and lower than usual, about here.” He gestured to his own ribs.

“If it does come back, would destroying its heart be enough to kill it?”

“Oh yes. Kill it stone dead.”

“Then … that’s how we kill it, right? Simple.”

“Not quite. Because most of it is comprised of a Faceless One, it will heal quickly. The stronger it gets, the faster it will heal, until it suffers no injuries at all. It would take an awful lot to damage the Grotesquery while it’s at full strength, I’m afraid. Have you found it yet?”

“No, we don’t even know where to start looking.”

“You should ask the Torment.” Skulduggery stiffened

“Who?” Valkyrie asked.

“A few years ago, I heard a rumor that a man called the Torment might know where the Grotesquery is hidden.”

"I know who he is," Skulduggery said, "And we just happened to bring someone into the Sanctuary who knows  _where_ he is. Thank you, Gordon, you have been a tremendous help."

"Want to come with us?" Valkyrie offered, "You don't have to be active but...You can sit in my house or something?"

Echo-Gordon was nodding enthusiastically at that idea.

000000000000000

Skulduggery dropped Valkyrie off at her house along with the echo-stone before driving down a couple of streets and stopping outside Satya's house.

He went inside, opening the door before calling, "Satya?"

"In the kitchen!" Came her reply.

He went into the kitchen to find her sitting at the breakfast bar, a few books open on her bench with notes scattered about. She turned as he walked in, flashing him a warm smile. She wore a robe, her hair tied back in a bun as she worked.

"I thought I said the world could manage without me for a while," Satya said teasingly, "Or has everything gone to shit already? I haven't received any calls."

"This is more personal business," He said, unwrapping his scarf from around his skull as he sat down in an armchair. Her forehead furrowed slightly as she dropped her pen, sliding so she was facing him, "What's happened?" She asked.

"I finally figured out about you and China," Skulduggery confessed.

"Ah," Satya looked away, the corners of her lips lifting sightly, "You don't have to worry, Skulduggery, it's just sex."

"I wanted to tell you to be careful," He said quietly, his skull not giving away any emotion, "China's not exactly trustworthy-"

"She may not be trustworthy, but she's no Abyssinia, Skul," Satya said lightly, "I know you never trusted her fully after the war and I certainly don't either. I use her as much as she uses me and I'm fine with that. Trust me, the second she starts showing some psychopathic tendencies, I'll put the bullet in her myself."

Skulduggery nodded, "I'm just doing what I promised and looking-"

"Out for me," Satya finished, "I know and I appreciate it," She said with a smile, "I really do."

Skulduggery stood, "Always and forever," He reminded her.

Satya tilted her head, her eyes full with an emotion he couldn't place, "Always and forever," She repeated in a murmur.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit I have no self control. So I edited both books and officially Hopeless is a shapeshifter. Sorry for the inconvenience but it was really bothering me. Nothing changed in the plot. I also had a dream about a scene based in mortal coil and holy fuck i am so excited to write it. (also idk if yall know this but i have a oneshots book based on this au and im currently working on a satya/dexter thing based in Casablanca so check that out if you actually enjoy my writing)
> 
> Anyway, hope yall enjoy this chapter. It's kinda short but kinda packed.

Valkyrie poured milk into her cereal bowl, whistling tunelessly when she heard a high pitched scream coming from her room. She immediately dropped the bottle of milk, snapping her fingers to summon a flame as she run upstairs to her room and found her mum pale, gaping at the blue hologram of her uncle.

"Calm down, Melissa!" Echo-Gordon soothed, "This is just a dream... Woooo.."

Melissa just shrieked, throwing her duster at him. It sailed harmlessly through him, landing unceremoniously on Valkyrie's desk.

Valkyrie winced, dissolving the flame in her hand, "Mum!" She ran forward, "I can explain."

"Explain?!" Melissa shrieked, "You can explain a living skeleton- Magic- A shapeshifter but this-?!" She pointed at Echo-Gordon, "How is this possible?!" Her breathing was erratic, "I'm going crazy- Oh dear lord-"

Valkyrie reached for her mother, holding her arm, "Before he died, Gordon imprinted himself on an echo-stone. Basically, this is a holographic clone," She tried to explain, feeling she was doing a pretty shit job at it.

"I'm a living consciousness!" Echo-Gordon exclaimed.

Valkyrie glared at him, "You're not helping! I told you to stay hidden!" He pouted, like a child being told off.

"How long have you known?" Melissa asked her, finally calming down. 

"I only found the echo-stone yesterday when we went to go research," Valkyrie told her, "Trust me, I was going to tell you when Dad was her."

Melissa narrowed her eyes, searching her daughter's face as if she was looking for a lie. Then she sighed and turned to Echo-Gordon, "You have some explaining to do, Gordon."

Echo-Gordon winced, "I think you look very beautiful today, Melissa," He said charmingly, before shrinking at her glare, "Yes, dear."

Valkyrie managed to escape the interrogation by a hair. Satya had pulled up into their driveway. "See ya!" She called before rushing out the door and slid into Satya's car, "Drive, quick! Before she makes me come back!"

Satya gave her a strange look but reversed out of the driveway, "Should I even ask...?"

"Long story."

"Fair enough."

"So, what's the plan?" Valkyrie asked, changing subjects, "Are we finding this Torment person?"

"That's the plan," Satya said, "He's one of the Children of the Spider. He fought on our side of the war with his sister Madam Mist. Erskine knows her quite well and apparently something went wrong between the two and now the Torment is trying to kill Madam Mist."

"Sounds rough."

"Anyway, Erskine's trying to contact Madam Mist to see if she knows anything but luckily there's a little rumour going around that Vaurien Scapegrace actually knows where exactly the Torment is. Hopefully, by the time we get there he would've spilled his guts," Satya told her, turning onto the motorway. 

"Shouldn't be too hard," Valkyrie commented, "He did burst into tears when I punched him."

"Hopeless sent Bliss in, he'll scare him straight," Satya said with a laugh.

It didn't take long for them to reach the Sanctuary. They went in through the museum entrance, passing a group of elders who were marveling at the wax figures. Soon, they were inside the actual Sanctuary.

On weekends, the Sanctuary worked on skeleton staff - figuratively, of course. This meant that Valkyrie's mother could actually get weekends off but she did end up coming in some days when Desmond had to go into the office for some reason. She claimed she had paperwork to do, but Valkyrie knew that she found the going-ons of the Sanctuary much more interesting than whatever her girlfriends were gossiping about.

Satya and Valkyrie made their way to Hopeless' office, passing a few Cleavers on their way.

Valkyrie went into his office, "Well, looks like a party."

She was of course joking. Everyone in the room looked downright grim.

Hopeless sat behind his desk, his head in his hands. Erskine and Saracen sat on one of the sofas, looking like someone had told them they were about to die. Dexter leaned against the office window, his expression brooding. Even Robin looked somber, sitting on Hopeless' desk.

Skulduggery, obviously emotionless, stood very still by Dexter.

"What happened?" Satya asked immediately, "Did you find the Torment?"

"Roarhaven," Erskine answered, "Madam Mist went as a favour to me but we're too late."

"Vengeous has the Armor according to the Torment and he is already on his way to the Grotesquery," Skulduggery said quietly.

Satya blinked, opening her mouth to say something before shutting it.

"I-" Valkyrie started before faltering, "I don't get it."

Skulduggery tilted her head, "Excuse me?"

"I mean-" Valkyrie shook her head, "How is he so ahead of us? Is there another spy?"

"Sometimes we're just not enough," Hopeless murmured before straightening up, "We need to stop him, we know that he's heading to Bancrook Castle, where does he go from there to open the portal?"

"There's something missing," Saracen murmured. Immediately, everyone turned to him. "Remember? There's two ingredients; The armor and the super secret ingredient that no one knows. If Vengeous is out now and is collecting all the missing pieces-"

"Then he knows what the ingredient is and where it is," Dexter finished off, "Saracen, you're a genius!"

"I know," Saracen said in confusion, "But I thought that was obvious?"

"No-" Dexter waved his hands, "We've been so thick- The answers were right there infront of us. Fucking Serpine pretty much told us himself!"

Satya gasped, seemingly in on the idea too, "Of course- Fergus' blood!" She exclaimed.

It slowly dawned on Valkyrie about what they were saying. "Serpine took Fergus so he could charge the Sceptre and summon the Faceless Ones," She said slowly, "The Sceptre was simply a beacon, right?"

"Exactly," Skulduggery said, "And now with the Grotesquery, same principle. The missing ingredient is Ancients' blood."

At last, Hopeless spoke, his voice grave, "Then it's a bad thing that a whole lot of descendants of the Ancients are having a family reunion tomorrow."

They all went silent with horror.

Robin broke the silence, "Well, shit."

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay face claims:  
> Valkyrie: Hannah Marks  
> Satya: Shivani Ghai  
> Hopeless:Henry Simmons  
> Erskine: Oscar Isaac  
> Dexter: Brett Dalton but blondish  
> Tanith: Rose Leslie but blonde  
> Saracen: Hugh Jackman  
> Robin: Nick Blood even though hes not a redhead.   
> Anton: I cant think of anyone???? Idk maybe a darker less smiley Colin Farrell  
> Ghastly: I cannot think for the life of me a good actor for ghastly. The Rock and Vin Diesel don't make the cut.  
> Skulduggery: I feel like when he was alive he looked like Colin Donoghue but the voice :/// Ill tell you when I figure it out.

"Springheeled Jack was broken out of prison," Tanith said, her expression one of fury, "I just put him away!"

"Who broke him out?" Valkyrie asked. 

"My contacts back in London said they found cracks in the wall," Tanith said, "I think it's pretty safe to say our good ol' friend, Billy-Ray Sanguine paid a visit," Her last words were spoken in a mock American accent.

"Jack isn't the type to join the Faceless Ones," Dexter said, "I bumped into him in America. He prefers to work alone."

The three of them had retreated to the training rooms, leaving the rest of the Dead Men to confer with Bliss and Guild as soon as Tanith had walked through the door.

"Does Hopeless really think that there's no spy?" Valkyrie asked, watching as Tanith showed her a move that Dexter took.

Dexter took his time to answer, "I think he's hopeful," He said carefully, "But I think he does know that it may be a possibility."

"A legitimate possibility seeing as how far ahead Vengeous is," Valkyrie said grimly, taking Tanith's place and copying the stance.

Dexter blocked her hit. She leaned down, using her elbow to punch him in the stomach and twisting so she could smack his head hard.

"Not bad," Tanith said with an approving nod, "Try and aim for the ear hard. It'll knock them out."

Someone cleared their throat. Valkyrie turned to see Skulduggery standing there.

"Call your parents," He said, his tone calm, "You're going to the family reunion, tonight. Satya will join you as Gordon's ex-girlfriend with a mask and Hopeless will be disguised as a distant cousin."

Valkyrie nodded, "Sounds good," She said, slightly glumly. She could feel worry welling up inside of her. How had she managed to drag her  _entire extended_ family into this mess? "But are you sure I can't just use the Reflection?" She put an extra tinge of annoyance into her tone.

"Hey," Dexter reached for her arm, patting it reassuringly, "You'll be fine."

000000000000

"Stop fidgeting!" Satya hissed to Valkyrie as they walked into the function room. 

"I can't help it!" Valkyrie hissed back, "This dress is too tight!" She was pinching at the bodice of her black dress.

"You wear pants tighter than that," Hopeless commented. He looked so strange to her. For one, he was the opposite skin tone with dark hair, a light brush of freckles across his nose and cheeks. He was slightly shorter, with added weight with no muscle.

"Yeah, but my lungs aren't in my legs," Valkyrie replied, but immediately stopped fidgeting when someone called her name, "Stephanie!"

She turned. The man was in his forties. His comb-over was neither subtle nor successful.

“It is Stephanie, isn’t it? Desmond’s daughter?”

Valkyrie drew a smile onto her face. “Yep,” she said. “It’s me.”

“Ah! Wonderful!” the man said, grabbing her into a hug that lasted two uncomfortable seconds. He released her and stepped back. The sudden movement had dislodged his comb-over. Valkyrie thought it polite not to mention it.

“Last time I saw you, you were knee-high to a grasshopper! You must have been, I don’t know, four? You were tiny! Now look at you! You’re beautiful! I can’t get over how much you’ve grown!”

“Yeah, nine years’ll do that.”

Satya coughed to hide her chuckle, Hopeless nudging her in warning.

"And you are?" The man asked them, quizzically.

"I was Gordon's girlfriend when he passed," Satya said, adopting a solemn expression. She had also put on a mask; lightening her skin and changing her features slightly.

"Oh, I am so sorry," the man said solemnly.

"And I'm Melissa's cousin. I was in town and Desmond graciously invited me to join the party," Hopeless cut in with a charming smile.

The man nodded before turning back to Valkyrie, "So, remember who I am?" He asked with a wide grin.

"Not a clue," She replied.

"Oh, come on- I'll give you a clue. My dad and your grandfather were brothers!"

Valkyrie just stared at him blankly, "You're my dad's cousin?"

The man's grin widened, "Now do you remember?"

"I think your mother is calling you, Steph," Satya cut in. 

He turned to look, and she moved off to his right.

She checked the time on her phone and found herself hoping that she’d get attacked by a pack of vampires sooner rather than later. This was a cruel and unusual ordeal she was going through, and if this turned out to be her last night alive, well then, that just wasn’t fair. 

"Anything out there?" Satya murmured, pressing her finger against the hidden earpiece she wore, "All clear," She told Valkyrie, "Might have to keep the dress on for awhile."

Valkyrie pulled a face. And then the Toxic Twins were in her way.

"Fancy seeing you here," Crystal said scathingly. Carol stood by her, not saying anything, quiet and meek.

"Family part in family reunion gave it away, huh?" Valkyrie said tiredly, pinching her dress again.

Satya immediately smacked her hand, drawing the attention of Crystal, "And who are you?" She asked, her voice masked in politeness.

"Doesn't matter," Satya replied with an equally fake smile, "The buffet is looking quite welcoming."

Satya grasped Valkyrie's arm and led her away, "Not a fight we want to start right now," She said wisely. 

Hopeless followed quietly, shaking his head.

“Steph,” her mother said, smiling brightly. “You’re here! Finally! And who are you...?" She gestured to Satya and Hopeless.

"Melissa," Hopeless greeted with a smile. 

Melissa blinked in surprise, "Grand Mage!" She exclaimed before wincing at her loud tone, "Wait- Why are you here? Is something wrong? Do we have to leave the reunion?"

Valkyrie winced, "Yeah... About that..."

Satya and Hopeless gave her the short version of the events, downplaying the actual gravity of the situation.

"So, a vampire may attack this party but we shouldn't worry because a bunch of goons are sitting outside this hall."

"Basically," Valkyrie confirmed with a nod, "Where's dad?"

“Oh, he’s around here somewhere. You know what Edgleys are like. Any excuse to talk about themselves and they grab it with both hands."

Satya snorted at that, shaking her head with a small grin, "Melissa, you sound like you're having a lot of fun."

"Oh, trust me," Melissa said, dryly, "I'm having so much fun. You see that lady over there?”

 

 

“The one with the strange-shaped head?”

“She’ll talk about her dogs. All night. She has three. They’re all small. What is it with small dogs?"

"What is it with small dogs?" Satya repeated quizzically, "Hold up," She pressed the earpiece again, "Say that again, Saracen?"

She froze suddenly, pulling out her phone immediately. "Saracen, what's happening?" Hopeless said into his own earpiece.

Valkyrie and Melissa watched in slight horror.

"Pick up, pick up, pick up-" Satya muttered, holding her phone to her ear, "Come on, China!"

"Shit," Hopeless swore, "Saracen says that Vengeous went after China again."

"She's not picking up," Satya said, looking to Hopeless worriedly.

"Go," He ordered her, "Take one of the boys with you."

She nodded before nodding at the others, "Be careful," She warned. 

Valkyrie nodded with a frown, "You too." Melissa echoing her words, her face filled with worry.

Hopeless stood by them, hidden behind Melissa as people mingled and moved. The band had started playing loud dance music and a number of Edgleys had taken to the dance floor. 

But Valkyrie was too worried to even bother laughing at the drunken fools. 

"I brought Gordon," Melissa whispered told Valkyrie, "I haven't told your father about him yet, thought I'd surprise him once he was drunk enough. That way if he took it badly we could pass it off as a hallucination."

"Good plan," Valkyrie whispered back.

Suddenly, Hopeless moved sharply, reaching for Valkyrie, "Dusk is here," he said.

00000000000

"One of you lot meet me by my car," Satya said into her earpiece as she ran down the steps from the hall. 

 _"Dexter's coming,"_ Saracen told her, _"Be careful."_

"I will-" Satya stopped when she saw a figure step onto the street, "On second thought," She murmured, "Maybe send everyone over? I found Dusk."

Satya dropped her mask, "Fancy seeing you here," She called, snapping her fingers to summon a flame.

Dusk came into clearer view, a sneer on his face, "I'll be done with you in seconds and then I'll kill all your mortal friends in that hall."

Satya moved fast, throwing a fireball before snapping the air to push him back. He snarled, smacking against a tree before straightening running at her with inhumane speed, his form a blur.

 _"Satya, what's happening?"_ Skulduggery's voice came through.

She managed to punch him, using the air to add force. He stumbled but he was up in seconds, leaning low to aim a punch at her stomach. 

Satya keeled over slightly but used his momentary drop in height to swing her leg around to kick his head. He snarled again, falling to one knee, earning a sharp kick to the back of his other knee.

He wasn't down though. He grabbed her arm, pulling it sharply. She let out a gasp in pain, using her other hand to pull his hair.

"You're too late!" He croaked with a wild grin. And he was right. Satya could hear the sound of screaming from the function hall.

Satya hissed, kneeing him hard in his back before snapping his neck.

"I got him," She muttered into her earpiece, hissing in pain as she stepped back, "He won't be out for long."

"Yeah, we have bigger problems."

Satya turned to see Dexter. "About fucking time," Satya muttered, "China's going to have to wait."

00000000000

Valkyrie stayed with Hopeless, Melissa following her closely. "Dad!" Valkyrie called. Desmond, who was laughing at something a distant cousin said, turned to look at her, "Hey, Steph. What's happening?" He asked cheerfully.

"Des," Melissa flashed a smile at the cousin, "Can I borrow you for a moment? Something came up in the office."

Desmond frowned but came with. 

"Vampires are about to ambush this place-" Suddenly, screams interrupted Valkyrie's explanation.

Valkyrie followed where a cluster had crowded, around something by one of the exits.

"Shit," Hopeless muttered before shouting, "Everyone! Out!"

The music had faltered, the crowd had begun getting bigger.

"Is she dead?" Valkyrie heard someone say. Her heart sunk in realisation.

She spotted something on the wall and she ran to in, breaking the glass and activating the fire alarm.

Immediately, sirens blared and the few people who hadn't joined the crowd began to back away before running out the hall but the crowd still stayed.

"Oh for the love of-" Valkyrie muttered before snapping her fingers and setting a buffet table aflame, "Fire!" She yelled, "There's a fire!"

That naturally caused more chaos but it managed to get more people screaming and out of the bloody hall.

"Valkyrie!" She turned and saw Satya and Dexter running towards her.

"Someone's dead," She told them.

"Vengeous has the blood," Hopeless confirmed, pale. He had managed to push through the crowd. 

"Where are the others?" Dexter asked, his eyes scanning the crowd,

"Coms are out," Satya said before turning to Valkyrie, "Stay with your parents, protect them, understand?" Valkyrie nodded. "Find Fergus- Get them away from here. There must be more vampires otherwise they'd be here."

00000000000

Ghastly slammed another vampire into the ground, setting him aflame. He dodged the oncoming hit of another, ducking before splaying his fingers, a force of air pushing the vampire back. 

Skulduggery shot two in the head, stopping them dead in their tracks before swinging the butt of his gun to hit another that had come to close, slamming his gloved hand forward to send the vampire flying away. He shot that one in the chest twice before reloading it and shooting another that was about to jump Ghastly.

Tanith swung her sword, beheading a vampire in a smooth, quick motion before roundhouse-kicking another. When it fell to the ground she stabbed it in the heart before swinging at the vampire that had come up on her right. 

"Is this a bad time to mention-" Saracen managed before stabbing a vampire in the head, "-that someone is dead?"

"Your power is the most useless thing on this planet!" Robin claimed in annoyance, sending a fireball at two oncoming vampires, "Dusk has been busy."

Erskine snapped the neck of the last vampire, kicking it down so Tanith could finish it off with her sword.

"How many was that?" Robin asked, surveying the pile of dead bodies on the golf course, "Forty?"

"I'd say thirty five," Skulduggery countered. The fire alarms had been going on for about five minutes, and it was enough to give the skeleton a headache. "Vengeous probably had Sanguine on hand to get the blood and get it to him as soon as possible. We have twenty-four hours to stop them."

Tanith wiped her blade, swinging her hair behind her shoulder, "We are cutting it fine," She warned, "How did Dusk manage to be hidden for so long? If Satya hadn't gone out, we could be looking at a massacre."

"I don't like this one bit," Saracen muttered, "I know Hopeless doesn't think there's a spy but that idea is looking very likely right now."

Skulduggery shook his head, "We can't think about that right not, we have other problems to worry about."

"Like the fact that we might have some Vengeful Gods hanging around in a day," Robin muttered.

 

 

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this has taken so long but I had this all written out and was almost ready to post but then somehow, someway my laptop decided to go to sleep and everything was lost.You have no idea how annoyed I am arrrgh. I have a lot of assessments which is also why it's taking a while but i swear im going to get this book finished by the end of the month then I can start the next book during my term break when I have less shit going on. Love yo faces :) 
> 
> This chapter is veeeeery short because I just wanted to update yall on the situation by i should have a good long chapter done by the end of the weekend.

They were basked in the pale moonlight. Hopeless, Bliss and Skulduggery stood in front, ready to command their army.

Who made up this army? The Dead Men stood, tall and proud, their gauntlets shining and their fingers curled, ready for a fight. The wall-walker, Tanith, stood next to Ghastly, her fingers wrapped around the hilt of her sword, tapping an unsteady rhythm. The Cleavers surrounded them, deadly silent and awaiting orders.

Valkyrie stood behind Dexter, her hand resting on her hip as she kept her eyes on the trees, waiting for someone, something to jump at them. It was a miracle she was here. Her parents had been ready to pack up their bags and take refuge across the world after the incident at the family reunion. Someone had died, a distant cousin of hers. 

Satya had managed to convince them that there was no real harm. "Valkyrie will be with Hopeless, he's not fighting either," She explained. She had been hesitant at first when Valkyrie had pleaded with her, but eventually came round when Valkyrie had brought up the fiasco with Serpine, "You sent me after a psychopath with a weapon of mass destruction!" Valkyrie had exclaimed, "How is this different?!"

"The first wave will consist of Dexter, Satya, Ghastly and myself," Skulduggery said, his voice low but carrying, "We will take the frontal assault while Tanith, Erskine, Robin and Saracen take the rear. Once we manage to weaken it somewhat, Anton will join and then once we've created an opening for injury, the Cleavers come in."

"Remember," Bliss spoke up, his voice void of emotion, "Baron Vengeous is nowhere to be found and Sanguine was spotter with the Grotesquery, so be on guard."

"Let's move it," Skulduggery ordered. Valkyrie followed Dexter, keeping low to try and not be caught out.

"I think not," Satya said sharply, blocking her path. Valkyrie groaned, "Satya!"

"It's too dangerous, Val," Satya told her, "And don't try and bring up Serpine, you know we had no other choice."

Valkyrie's shoulders slumped in defeat and she reluctantly trudged back to Hopeless. 

"She looks a lot like Skulduggery when she does that," Ghastly commented with a snort, "Remember when he used to sulk when you told him off?"

"Too well," Satya muttered, shaking her head, "Difference is that this is life and death and with Skulduggery it was about pulling him out of brothels."

"That's a story I have to hear one day," Dexter commented with a grin. 

Back with Hopeless, Valkyrie pulled out her phone checking her messages before switching it off. 

"I know how you feel," Hopeless said, his tone wistful as they watched the rest of the Dead Men disappear into the trees, "It feels so wrong standing here while my brothers are fighting."

Valkyrie instantly felt a little bad for her whining, "Did you do this often? Split up during the war, I mean?"

Hopeless thought for a moment before shaking his head, "No, it was very rare that we weren't on the same mission. I did sometimes go ahead to scout in a disguise, but Satya usually kept up a mask so all of us could travel together," He said thoughtfully, "The only time we were apart was when Skulduggery went missing and we thought he was dead, and the time when we thought Erskine was dead."

"Yikes."

Hopeless chuckled lightly at that, "Yikes is right."

They stood in silence before suddenly, the ground shook and Valkyrie could see in a distance, the hospital blow to the sky.

"NO!" Hopeless screamed and began running towards them.

Valkyrie was frozen and moved when she heard a choking sound behind her. 

She turned and stumbled back as Bliss fell to his knees, a fist of shadows through his chest, Baron Vengeous standing behind him, shrouded in shadows and death.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not sorry about the last cliffhanger loooool but very sorry this took so long to get out

Tanith swung her sword hard at the Grotesquery's stinger, ducking as it swung at her in annoyance, like swatting a fly.

Erskine and Robin worked together, balls of flame merging and hitting the monster. The Grotesquery paid no heed, instead choosing to swat Saracen  _hard._

Saracen flew back into the concrete wall before falling onto the ground. He didn't get up.

"Skul- Do it now!" Satya shouted.

Skulduggery tossed aside his gun and jumped, stabbing the spike into the area he’d been shooting. The Grotesquery took hold of him and flung him back, but the cylinder had a red light on top, and it was flashing.

"Run!" He shouted, running towards Saracen to get him out of harms way.

Satya and Ghastly backed away from the Grotesquery, Tanith ran.

The explosion sent Robin to his knees, falling to the ground as he held his head in pain.

The smoke cleared, revealing the Grotesquery in perfect condition, save for a single wound on its arm. They watched in silent horror as a single drop of black blood leaked out before sealing. 

Tanith gathered her strength and sprang, but the Grotesquery batted her away. Her body twisted as she fell, and when she hit the ground, she tried to get up again but couldn’t.

Satya masked herself in shadows, jumping from behind and using her dagger to slide down its body. The Grotesquery simply used its stinger to throw her off, and she slammed into Ghastly. But her dagger had left a wound.

"Anton!" Skulduggery roared, pulling out her pistol and aiming for the wound.

Anton Shudder withdrew from the shadows, his gauntlet shining as he clenched his face, his eyes glinting before he closed them.

Suddenly, like a breath was leaving his body, a creature of smoke and shadows, a dark and rabid thing left his chest, tied to his body by his fury and madness.

The gist snarled as it lunged at the Grotesquery from behind, pulling Anton to his knees as it scratched and clawed. 

The Grotesquery stepped back.

"It's weakening," Ghastly said in realization, "Dexter, the signal!" He yelled.

The energy thrower responded, raising his hands to the sky, light filling his palms.

Then out of nowhere, the Grotesquery's stinger hit him, knocking him over.

Dexter yelped, his arms falling.

"Shit!" Ghastly swore, as the electricity hit the building instead, setting the entire place aflame.

oooooooooooooo

Valkyrie felt sick as she watched Bliss slump to his knees, the light in his eyes dimming instantly.

"The Gods will reward me for this," Baron Vengeous announced, his fist of shadows receding.

"Hopeless!" Valkyrie called, snapping her fingers, a flame forming, "We have a problem!'

Hopeless turned back at her voice and swore, "Val- Run!" He pulled out his gun, aiming and shot.

Valkyrie ran, dodging the burst of shadows that came at her. Three bullets whizzed past her but were deflected by the Baron's tornado of shadows.

"Heathens!" He snarled, "How dare you attack a god!"

Valkyrie reached Hopeless, grabbing his arm and tugging him towards the shade of the trees.

"Cleavers!" Hopeless shouted, "NOW!"

As the two ran, cleavers emerged from the trees, their scythes flashing in the moonlight.

One half ran for the Baron, the other through the trees and towards the hospital that was on fire.

Valkyrie and Hopeless slowed their run as they stared, dumbstruck. The hospital was falling and above it, the Grotesquery - at least that's what Valkyrie thought it was - rose into the skies.

In the midst of the smoke, she could make out figures stumbling out, shields of air deflecting the smoke.

Dexter was wounded, leaning heavily on Ghastly. Saracen was limping. Tanith was supported by Robin. Anton followed behind, his shirt in shreds. Skulduggery, Satya and Erskine took the rear.

"Vengeous is here- Bliss is dead!" Valkyrie yelled.

"Our Elders are dropping like flies!" Ghastly said when he reached them. Hopeless took Dexter's other side, "Thanks, love you too, mate," He said.

"Shit," Satya swore, standing her ground. Skulduggery stiffened next to Valkyrie's side.

The Grotesquery had gone to the trees where the Baron stood, unharmed.

"I hate that fucking armor," Ghastly muttered, his eyes glinting dangerously. With a pang, Valkyrie remembered his mother had been killed by Lord Vile.

"Satya," Skulduggery murmured quietly as the Baron slowly moved closer, shadows creeping towards them. The Grotesquery followed him like a sick pet, listening to his every order.

"Done," Satya replied and Valkyrie could feel the cold work of her necromancy crawl over them, forming a mask.

"Don't you want your friend?" The Baron's voice echoed through the clearing. The shadows around him tightened before spitting out China Sorrows.

Satya stiffened. China fell to the ground. She was bleeding, her sigils pulsing a faint blue, her clothes torn.

"What do we do?" Anton asked quietly, tense.

"Satya, Hopeless- Get Dexter and China out," Skulduggery's voice was sharp and quick, "Valkyrie-"

"I'm not running," She interrupted.

"I know," He replied, "You and Tanith- Tanith, can you fight?"

"Bruised ribs ain't gonna stop me," Tanith answered.

"You two, Ghastly, Robin and Erskine go for the Grotesquery."

"And us?" Anton asked.

"We're just left with our little friend he-"

Suddenly, Baron Vengeous lunged with a snarl. His shadows struck through the mask. Skulduggery lunged at Satya with lightning speed but was still too late as the shadows wrapped around her, choking her.

"I think not!" Vengeous snarled, "You are not fit to use the magic of the gods!"

Erskine threw a fireball but Vengeous simply vanished in a puff of smoke and shadows.

Satya let out a choking sound as she fell to her knees, the shadows gone.

"Saracen-" Skulduggery shouted, lunging forward with his pistols out.

"Ahead of you-" Saracen sprang forward, grabbing Satya and following Hopeless who had already began dragging Dexter away.

Valkyrie used the air to push Tanith forward. Tanith leaped high for the Grotesquery, swiping at it with her sword.

Together, they worked side by side. Tanith slicing and Valkyrie aiming at the weak spots. They worked with Ghastly, Robin and Erskine, wearing it down.

ooooooooooo

“Oh damn it,” was all Skulduggery had time to say, before a wave of darkness erupted from Vengeous’ hand and slammed into him.

There was a moment of stillness, and then Vengeous reached out his arm and a streak of shadow wrapped around Skulduggery and pulled him closer.

Anton let the gist loose. It tore at Vengeous, causing him to loosen his hold on Skulduggery. But he simply waved his hand, the armor shifting and moving like a second skin, causing the shadows to knock Anton away. The gist faltered, before throwing itself at the necromancer. 

Again, Vengeous knocked it away but this time, Anton as pushed down, the gist flying away from him before jumping into his chest, like a rubber band being pulled before springing back. The impact knocked him flying away, towards the rubble of the hospital.

“So, so easy,” Vengeous laughed.

"You are nothing without that armor," Skulduggery managed as the shadows began its course to him, "You have barely a fraction of the power Vile had-"

The shadows lunged at him, tightening.

"Now, now, Dead Man," Vengeous tutted, "You weren't even around- Am I not right to remember that you decided to run away like a coward when Vile came around?"

Skulduggery fell to his knees, the shadows tightening around him.

"You're too late!" Vengeous suddenly said maniacally, "The eclipse is at it's peak! Look!"

Skulduggery turned his skull slightly, "No-"

The Grotesquery was starting to glow a pale, blue hue. It carried on swatting at Valkyrie and the others, throwing them aside.

Then out of nowhere, the gist returned. The snarling creature of fury came from behind, toppling Vengeous.

The shadows receded and Skulduggery immediately rose to his feet, hurling a fireball.

It struck Vengeous in the chest, and the clothes he wore under the armor went alight. Vengeous cursed and used the shadows to douse the flames but was immediately rampaged by the gist. Blood started to trickle from Vengeous’ burned chest.

It was almost poetic, the way Vengeous fell to his knees, like a devotee kneeling at his god's alter.

Skulduggery quickly turned to watch the fight with the Grotesquery before swearing-

oooooooooo

Valkyrie flew back, hitting the ground hard with a grunt. The Grotesquery had exploded with a bright blue light, blinding her temporarily.

She blinked hard, wincing as she sat up. She grabbed Skulduggery's outstretched hand, pulling herself up, "What do we do now?" She grumbled, dusting herself off. Her head was pounding, her ears ringing.

The light faded and the Grotesquery stood, unharmed and still.

Anton was lying on the ground, unconscious. The gist had drained him.

Ghastly rose, slowly backing away from the Grotesquery and towards Tanith who lay crumpled about five meters away.

Skulduggery stiffened, turning immediately and raised his gun, pointing it at Baron Vengeous who stood weakly. His shadows were flickering, flowing into the armor like a plug in a bathtub being pulled, all the water draining.

"Tell them I tired-" He whispered. His eyes were glazed, his hand resting on his chest where the gist had torn through from the back.

Skulduggery cocked the gun.

“Tell them I’m sorry,” Vengeous whispered. “I’ve failed them.”

Valkyrie swallowed as the Grotesquery stepped towards Vengeous, it's hand almost tenderly touching his face.

Then it snapped his neck.

And Vengeous fell to the ground, dead. The shadows flickered out. 

All that was left was a dead man. In a dead man's armor.

"Now would be a good time for a miracle," Valkyrie muttered, flexing her fingers. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Robin get up, holding his hand to his ribs in pain. He slowly began dragging himself towards Anton and she prayed to whatever force was out there that the Grotesquery didn't see him.

She held out her hand, using the air to summon Tanith's sword. It flew to her hand from the grass, soaked in the blood of the Grotesquery.

"Miracles are for people with no imagination," Skulduggery replied.

"Yeah, but guess what-" Valkyrie started as the Grotesquery turned its head towards them, "We need one."

The Grotesquery tilted its head before raising its head.

"We're our own miracle right now," Skulduggery said before snapping his fingers, "Ravel! Quit napping!" Erskine still didn't get up.

He threw the fireball at the Grotesquery. Valkyrie lunged with the sword, swiping as Skulduggery shot.

Valkyrie jumped up, swinging the sword diagonally across the Grotesquery’s chest, lopping off sections of splayed ribcage. Another swipe took the Grotesquery’s left hand. It fell to the ground. 

Skulduggery took advantage of this, pushing off the ground to jump onto it.

The Grotesquery flailed, trying to swat him off but Valkyrie jumped, swiping off the stinger before impaling it in the back, she dragged the sword done, the blood spraying into her face. 

The Grotesquery screamed.

The scream knocked them both away.

It was pain and darkness and death and fear and-

Valkyrie's head was pounding, louder and louder. She fell to the ground, the sword forgotten on the ground as she rocked back and forward. 

And she screamed.

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some random epiloguey stuff

China Sorrows remembered the night her brother left her like it was yesterday.

It was late at night, the servants had gone to their quarters, hidden away as servants should. Her mother and father had long since gone to sleep.

The candles flickered, dancing shadows lit up China's beautiful face in the darkness. An old Latin text sat on her lap, her quill poised to write.

The door opened, creaking despite the particular care the intruder took to come in unannounced.

"Glad you could join us, brother," her cool voice echoed through the empty room.

Bliss froze in the doorway before stepping in, shutting the door.

"Where were you?" She questioned, her quill scratching the parchment harshly, her voice innocent.

"Does it matter?" He replied, shrugging off his coat.

"It does when you're working for the enemy."

Bliss stiffened, "What are you talking about?"

China's lips turned upwards slightly, "I had one of my spies tail you. She followed you into a brothel and less than twenty minutes later, Corrival Deuce walked in."

Bliss swore before turning sharply to wrench the door open but China was too quick, tapping the sigil on her forearm that mirrored the bright blue sigil on the door, locking it.

China stood, "You betrayed us, our gods," She said quietly, her eyes flashing angrily. 

"Stop this," Bliss warned, "You know Mevolent is wrong- This is all wrong-"

"Mevolent asked me to head the Diablerie."

Bliss stopped speaking immediately, his eyes wide in horror.

China walked to the glass cabinet, unlocking it and pulling out a a glass and a bottle of liquor, "I said yes."

"To killing innocents? Murdering families?"

"To serving my family and my gods," She hissed.

"Gods?" Bliss let out a dark laugh, "Our gods want to destroy this world- What have they ever done for us?"

"Then why haven't you left?" She countered, a smile forming on her lips, evil and sickening, "Go join the good fight, or whatever it is the Sanctuary believes in."

Bliss said nothing.

"Go, brother," China ordered, "Leave before the dawn prayers and I won't say anything."

"Come with me," He said, "We could run now, not be caught in the crossfire."

"Too late," China said nonchalantly, taking a sip of her whiskey, "We both know we've been in the crossfire since we were born."

"All the more reason to leave!" Bliss hissed, his hand running through his hair in frustration.

"I'm not leaving, Bliss," China said, her expression sobering, "I can't."

Bliss swallowed, then nodded, grabbing his coat and swinging it around his shoulders, "Goodbye, China."

She tapped her forearm, unlocking the door, "Goodbye, Bliss."

And he was gone.

China looked down at her brothers face. He looked peaceful, almost like he was asleep. They had put him in a suit, the blood had been cleaned away, the hole in his chest hidden away.

She swallowed hard, taking a step away from the coffin. "Goodbye, brother," China whispered.

She began walking away from the room, down the hallway, away from the cemetery.

"China!" She stopped, closing her eyes before turning to see Satya, dressed in a beautiful black dress, walking towards her.

"Where are you going?" She asked, stopping in front of her, "It's about to start."

Chine didn't meet her eyes, tucking her hair behind her hair, "I'm leaving- I'm going home."

Satya blinked before swallowing, raising her hand to stroke China's cheek, "Are you sure?" She said softly.

China nodded, closing her eyes momentarily, resting her cheek against Satya's warm hand before pulling away. 

Satya searched her face before nodding. Then after a slight hesitation she leaned forward, placing a soft kiss against the corner of China's lips. 

She pulled away and China just nodded again before turning on her heel, her hair and dress flowing behind her as she left Satya alone in the hallway.

oooooooooooo

Hopeless stepped away from the stand, shifting the collar of his Grand Mage robes in discomfort. He greeted a few mages before heading towards Skulduggery, Satya, Dexter and Saracen who were having a hushed conversation.

"Where's China?" He asked as he drew near, "Some people want to speak with her."

"She left," Satya answered tiredly. Hopeless nodded before shifting his collar again. Satya sighed, shaking her head before reaching it and fixing it, using her hands to refold it in the places where it was scratching him.

"Thanks."

"You're most welcome, your highness."

Hopeless glared at her, shaking his head before sighing, "I already have three people sucking up to me, trying to become Elder."

"Dirt hasn't even settled on Bliss' grave yet and they're already scrambling for the post," Skulduggery said, tilting his head, "Better pick someone quickly otherwise it'll drag on."

They all watched Thurid Guild who was standing by the food table with a group of older mages. Despite his somber facade, Hopeless could see the slight amusement on the Elder's face, almost like he was pleased.

"Anyone else see it?" He murmured.

"Plain as day," Saracen replied, shaking his head, "We should be careful around him."

"Hey, guys," Valkyrie joined them, looking tired and glum.

"Where were you sitting?" Dexter asked, looking over her to see Melissa and Desmond standing by the chairs, talking quietly to each other, "I didn't see you."

"We got here late," She replied, "Just when Hopeless was giving his speech. We had to go to the other funeral, it was this morning."

No one had anything to say to that. 

"Satya," Skulduggery interrupted the silence, "Ivory Thorn is over there."

Hopeless looked over to where he had gestured and had to blink to steady himself for a moment, "It's been a while since I've seen her," He said in wonder, observing the woman from afar.

"Come on, Val," Satya hooked her arm through the girl's, "Let's go meet an old friend." 

"I need to go speak to some more people," Hopeless told the others, "I'll see you tonight at dinner."

oooooooooooo

"Ivory," Satya greeted, "It's been awhile."

Valkyrie blinked, pretty sure she was hallucinating as she stared into the eyes of a clone of Morwenna Crow.

"It has," The woman said with a soft smile, "It's good to see you again, Satya."

Satya rested a hand on Valkyrie's shoulder, "Valkyrie, this is Ivory Thorn- Elder Crow's sister."

Valkyrie blankly reached to shake Ivory's hand.

"I wanted to speak to you concerning Lord Vile's armor," Satya said softly.

Ivory's smile was bitter, "You couldn't wait till after the funeral?"

Satya swallowed, averting her eyes before meeting her gaze, "I wish it could but I wasn't sure if I would see you again. You have a habit of disappearing straight after funerals and this is of grave importance."

Ivory nodded, her eyes resting on Bliss' grave. "Very well," She said finally, "What do you need?"

"I need to bind the armor," Satya said, "I know how to do it- I can walk you through everything. But I need a full-blooded necromancer and a sigil master and I didn't want to-"

"Didn't want to go to the Temple," Ivory finished, "I'll come by tomorrow morning."

"Thank you, Ivory," Satya said gratefully before she noticed something behind the woman, "And who's this?"

Valkyrie's eyes widened, "Hey- I know you!"

A girl about her age stepped out from behind Ivory, "Hello," She greeted quietly. She wore a long black dress and a coat. 

"This is my daughter, Livia," Ivory said.

"We have Maths together," Valkyrie said in realisation.

"And History," Livia replied, "And English."

Valkyrie blinked then nodded, "Right, yeah."

Satya gave a small cough then spoke, "Well, we should probably let you go," She said, "Till tomorrow."

Ivory nodded.

"Ivory," Satya stopped, and turned back, "I'm sorry about Morwenna- And Bliss too."

Ivory said nothing.

ooooooooooo

"I didn't know Crow had a sister."

Satya shrugged, "She didn't really advertise it much. Ivory defected from the Temple of Necromancy during the war and remained neutral. That's how she knew Bliss- He broke her out. Like him and China, Ivory and Morwenna weren't very close after the war."

"I didn't even know that Livia was a sorcerer," Valkyrie added as they joined Skulduggery who stood alone, leaning against a tree.

"Why are you all the way out here?" Satya asked him.

"I was told to leave because my apparent lack of empathy was offensive."

Valkyrie snorted, earning the skeleton's version of a glare. "What?" She said innocently, "It's not like you ever empathise anyway."

"For that you can walk from school tomorrow."

She pulled a face before checking her watch.

"Are you coming to dinner tonight?" He asked her. She nodded.

"Good, Hopeless is deciding who's going to be the new Elder."

"He's decided?" Satya asked in surprise.

"Well, no," Skulduggery back tracked, "But he said he'll have it figured out by the end of the night."

"I'm going to leave now," Satya said,"I need to stop by China's."

ooooooooooooo

Satya knocked on China's door. After a few moments, it opened. Satya went in, "I need you to come by the Sanctuary tomorrow," She said, walking in without greeting, "We're going to bind the armor."

China didn't answer, just sat in her chair with a book in hand, a glass of red wine in the other.

"Ivory was at the funeral," Satya continued, "Did you know she has a daughter? She's Valkyrie's age."

Nothing.

Satya sighed before reaching over the chair, tilting China's face towards her. China looked at her, eyebrows raised.

Satya searched them before pulling away, "That was literally all I came for- Check you were actually alive and all and not high."

"I'll call if anything changes."

Satya winced.

China's voice was hoarse and tired.

"Call me if you run out of wine."

"Will do."

ooooooooooooo

Saracen shuffled the deck of cards before dealing them out face down to each person at the table. Valkyrie watched from the doorway of Ghastly's living room.

"You know how it goes," Saracen pulled out a stopwatch, "On your marks, get set , play."

Robin was the first to play, holding out one of his cards towards Satya. She took it, offering another to Dexter. He took it and handed another to Skulduggery.

It was a strange game, barely a game. Valkyrie watched as they all swapped cards in silence. Hopeless stood behind Anton, tense.

"Time's up," Saracen announced.

Ghastly was the first to turn over his cards. He let out a relieved sigh, no joker in sight. Skulduggery followed suit, then Satya, then Anton, then Dexter.

Then Erskine swore as he flipped his cards over.

"Yes!" Robin fist-pumped, "I going to run away if I got it!"

"Congratulations, Erskine," Hopeless said dryly, "You are the newest Elder of the Sanctuary of Ireland."

Erskine leaned his head against the table, "Why me?" He groaned.

"Better you than me," Satya said, finishing off her glass of liquor in one go.

"Now that that's out of the way," Dexter said, flicking his cards away, "Robin has something he would like to say."

Everyone turned to look at Robin questioningly. He looked confused before paling, "Dexter!" He exclaimed.

Dexter shrugged, taking a sip of his whiskey innocently, "I'm just helping you."

Robin looked around helplessly before resting his eyes on Anton who sat beside him, looking quite unimpressed with all the current events.

"Oh, I suppose I probably should," Robin said before getting up, "Anton Shudder, will you marry me?"

Anton looked at him with wide eyes, opening his mouth.

"YES!" Erskine explained, sitting up with a wide grin, "Hand it over, fellas!"

Robin blinked, temporarily distracted, "I'm sorry, what?"

"They bet on you," Hopeless informed him, "Everyone picked a year and who ever was closest was owed $100 by everyone for every year they were off."

"And I said 1980s- I want my money!" Erskine said happily, snapping his fingers.

"You bet on me?!" Robin repeated, aghast.

"Don't get too excited, Erskine," Satya said with a smile, "I said 2016."

Erskine's smile fell, "Who's your witness?" He countered, "I don't remember you ever making a bet."

Satya;s grin widened, "Dexter."

Erskine looked accusingly at Dexter who pulled a face before nodding, "She did say that when we were in Casablanca."

"I accept cash, checks and wire transfers," Satya said, filling up her glass with more liquor.

"Um..." Valkyrie interrupted, "Maybe we should actually hear Anton's answer?"

Everyone froze, turning to look at Anton who only had eyes for Robin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEYYY ITS THE END OF BOOK 2!!!!!   
> I have a few assessments coming up so I might not start book 3 until my holidays start in two weeks but I will post chapters for my oneshot book :)


End file.
